If my garage and attic mated, it would be one ugly baby. They are both full of mountains of junk, stacked with no particular rhyme or reason. I cursed the day I had to find the leaf blower. I cursed the day I had to find wall paint. I cursed many days. I curse the fact that I’m staring down the barrel of Christmas decorations that are still waiting to be put away…but where? It sucks, but I need to man up and get this junk organized before it causes my hairline to recede.
Sears is running a nice sale for 20% off tool storage over $99 and 20% off all garage storage items that cos
t over $100. If you are in the market, you should absolutely check out the tool storage blowout, also at Sears. This includes the best of the best savings in the (more…)
Ho ho ho and a bottle of rum.
If that’s your idea of a good Christmas, then chances are, you’ll be spending more of your Christmas out in the garage with the guys taking down a few cold ones, as opposed to being huddled around the kitchen drinking wassail and humming Christmas songs. Not to suggest that a sing-a-long to Bette Midler’s Merry Christmas album is necessarily a bad thing, of course not… *cough* lame *cough*… But at least around here we can respect the fact that a guy sometimes just wants to enjoy the company of other men with celebrations of beer, power tools, and oil stains.
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What makes a man?
Is it the power in his hands?
Is it his quest for glory?
Give it all you got
To fight to the top
So we can know your story?
Behind every great man is a great set of tools. Sure, some may say it’s the woman in his arms that makes the man, but we know the truth. Great tools make great men. I mean seriously (more…)
Sure, we may not always pick the right card at Hallmark–or even remember to get a card. We may not always say the right things at the right times, or be as sentimental as our female counterparts. We may not understand someone’s feelings, or see things through someone else’s eyes.
But that’s what makes us who we are: men.
Sure, that doesn’t mean some men aren’t sympathetic, or that we’re never romantic, or that we are always forgetful about special occasions. Of course not…
But that doesn’t change the fact that we’re simple creatures. We like fast cars, sports on big screen TVs, drinking beer over a game of shuffle board, and trading dirty jokes. We like to make unfavorable noises, yell and cuss at people on the road, and talk about chicks.
But that’s part of the beauty of what we are. Where women go for manicures and pedicures, men go for power tools and pneumatic tools. And since this is a site for men, we’re going to feature tools. Because that’s who we are. That’s what we do.
So today, remind yourself of who you are: a man. Reinforce that fact by taking a look at Tool King and the Porter Cable CFFNSAR 3-Gallon Oil Free Compressor, Finish Nailer, and Sander combo kit for $210. And if that still doesn’t do it for you, check out the Orgazmo Theme Song, “Now You’re a Man” for some extra reinforcement.
Now you’re a Man! A Manny Manny Man!
When I was a kid, my friends and I would make fun of the guys who worked out 5 hours a day and walked around like they were carrying invisible tires. One overly-tanned, overly shaven dude, in particular, was a real standout amongst his invisible tire-carrying compadres. We called him “The Tire Man”. …until he found out and 
threatened us with his beefy biceps mental capacity.
As part of a big weekend sale, Sears has all tires on sale today and is even offering 50% off the WeatherHandler 44-Piece Emergency Auto Kit ($9.99, 50% off $20). I like to picture The Tire Man lovingly stocking tires at Sears, showing society that he has something to offer beyond his carefully oiled pecs.
Cheers!
Jack
Roy Wayne Farris, aka the Honky Tonk Man, was just off his game. Throughout the entire match, Bobby “The Brain” Heenan had been manhandling him. Roy knew he couldn’t take much more of this. He hadn’t even had a chance to break out his signature “Shake, Rattle, and Roll” move.
A moment later, Heenan picked up the weakened Honky Tonk Man, and bodyslammed him into the mat. This wasn’t looking too good. However, Roy’s thoughts were somewhere else. For some reason, he could not quit thinking about his Craftsman Professional Craftsman Professional All-In-One Cutting System Kit.
Just then, Honky Tonk was thrown into the ropes by The Brian, followed by a vicious clothesline. As his surroundings turned black from the incredible blow, deep in his mind, he was still thinking about the sound of the powerful 5.5 amp motor coming to a slow and steady speed, and the built-in worklight that makes jobs a cinch.
A few seconds later, his surroundings came back. The Brian was lifting his hands up in victory, having just defeated the beaten down Honky Tonk Man. Nonetheless, Honky Tonk knew he was still the true winner, as he anxiously awaited his arrival back at home to start on his next woodworking project.
Everyone loves a great deal, and Wal-Mart has set us up the bomb with their clearance sale this week. You can save on hundreds of items, ranging from home and garden products to electronics and much, much more.
For example, you can save 26% on this Archos 605 160GB Media Player w/ WiFi. Normally $268, this media player comes in at a great price of just $198.
Or check out their discounts on outdoor furniture, like this set of Delahey 2-pk Bar Chairs. This set just screams “a tall mai tai with a good book on a warm summer day!”
Have a great week!
Whether you’re a weekend warrior, or your wife wants you to be a weekend warrior, we all have our honey-do lists. Certainly we’d rather be lounging by the pool sporting our brand new Analog Abberton Board Shorts, but unfortunately, life doesn’t always work that way.
So, instead of spending double or triple the time knocking out your weekend projects, try using one of these bad boys: the DeWalt 1/4 Inch (6.35mm) 9.6V Cordless Impact Driver Kit. At $145, that’s a 62% discount off the regular price, and a killer deal.
This deal only lasts through today (6/17), as it’s Tool King’s one day deal. And for many more great one day deal offerings, be sure to check out OneDayBuys.com.
General Patton continued to study the map. “We have to get some g#$ d#@$ gunners in there. Do whatever it takes!”
The officers surrounding Patton continued to radio the front lines. The entire 66th Armor Regiment was deployed, attempting to secure a strategic building.
Two hours later, the ranking officer in the field, Major Starks, called in on the radio back to Patton: “Sir, we have secured the target and now have complete control. Awaiting further orders.”
Patton yelled, “give me that damn radio and show me the schematic of the building.”
Thirty seconds later, Patton was unfolding the building schematic and preparing to issue instructions.
“Major Starks, this is General Patton. Your orders are as follows:
Proceed through the main entryway and make a left down the first hall. At the end of the hall, you’ll see a giant red door. Go through this door, and turn on the desktop located on the desk.
Immediately pull up your browser and proceed to the following URL:
http://www.bargainjack.com/BargainJack.com-deals-V398/List-of-Memorial-Day-Sale-Events-at-BargainJack.com-64053
Upon reaching this URL, read off the list of Memorial Day sales, because I really need a new set of pants, and perhaps even some sporting goods equipment.”
Major Starks followed orders, and within a few minutes was back on the radio with General Patton.
“Sir, I have obtained the list. It looks like Cabela’s has a 50% off Memorial Day sale, and Backcountry.com has a Memorial Day Sale on tents, sleeping bags, backpacks, and more. There’s also a sale at Uneetee, where you can save 15% with code SVMD15.”
“What about FingerHut?”
“Sir, yes, there’s a sale at FingerHut, with 15% off sitewide using coupon code EF247.”
“Good job, major! We will review your findings and report back with our orders!”
[Happy Memorial Day everyone! And thanks to everyone who serves in the military, and especially those who have sacrificed their lives protecting our freedoms!]
Hahahahahaha! Yeahhhhhhhhhhhhh! Sears.com rocks. Each Saturday, Sears is running a 
favorite possessions is on sale: the 
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